Slow Down

A student not too long ago played in four quick jabs the four chords I had just shown him and said, “Okay. Those are pretty easy. Got it.” He sat back and looked at me expectantly. “I think I have that song down.” I’m thinking now about how often I hear students say that and how defensive they get when I answer, “Strum the chords again, but with the tempo and feel of the song. Hear the song in your head as you’re strumming and feel what you’re playing.”

It’s not easy to play a song beautifully. Yes, you have to learn the chords and know them well, but more importantly, you have to open up your heart and feel emotion. I think students who rush through chords like I described above and then check off the song like an item on a list are doing so to feel a sense of accomplishment without actually feeling any emotion, and their defensiveness when I ask them to strum chords with more feeling and sensitivity is a reluctant acknowledgment that they know their approach isn’t giving them what they want—and a moment like that is when my guitar teaching really begins.

When students acknowledge there’s something wrong in their approach, their walls come down a little bit, and the defensiveness is a way to put the walls right back up again. What do I say so that they let the walls stay down—at least for a little while? The students feel vulnerable in that moment and are on the verge of a big step forward in their guitar playing. How can I help them tolerate that moment?